I thought when I got married all of that would be forgotten. There are many other regrets I have, probably even more than the regrets from sexual sin.Regrets that have to do with not being secure in who I was, not using my time wisely, not being a good witness for Jesus, allowing men to determine my worth for myself, not being strong in my convictions, not truly being surrendered to Jesus, and staying in relationships longer than I should have.

dating purpose purity-18

Brenda was single for longer than she expected, and it was the hardest time in her life.

During those years she could not reconcile why God gave her the intense desire to be a wife and mother and yet those desires were not being fulfilled.

Now, her mission is to mentor young women for purposeful lives of faith.

She writes about her personal relationship with Jesus, singleness, community, relationships, mentoring, and raising daughters. Now I realize that this came from a low self-esteem and fear of never getting married.

Today, Brenda hopes to share with you wisdom she learned from her years as a single woman with the hope that you will be well equipped to lead a life of peace and purpose. I was not a girl who dated much in high school or college, and I had very strong convictions, but as time went on I got scared and so I compromised my values in fear of not finding a husband. Even though sexual sin is forgivable like all other sin, there are consequences that everyone has that God typically does not take away.

You can be forgiven and redeemed, and you can live free from bondage to regret and shame, but there are some practical consequences that remain.God can remove them, but I have found in my own life, and looking at the lives of others, that He usually doesn’t.I call myself a “recovering single” because I never knew that the choices I made as a single woman would follow me into my married life.So yes, the things I mentioned above have affected my marriage in how I interact with my husband. That’s why it’s so important to use your single years to get healthy – as healthy as possible – even healthy from childhood issues, etc. With other people I dated there was always unrest, conflict, etc.No one is ever going to have perfect emotional health until heaven, however, it’s important to work on emotional health before marriage especially if God is giving you the time to do so. But with my husband I had peace and never questioned it.I don’t think I logically thought that or would even verbalize it in that way, but my actions and responses definitely proved that I believed that lie. Now with that said, we both agree that we probably should have dated a little longer. So even if there’s peace, I don’t know if that necessarily means to move ahead.